Fat Cow.

When I began this blog, I had high expectations of upbeat stories of adventures I had been on or funny anecdotes to tell. The reality is, the whole past year has basically been one fat slob fest for me. I’m starting to liken myself to a potato.

I’m now what one would call “between jobs” …again. I decided that the travel industry just wasn’t quite doing it for me anymore. The vibe got me turning that frown upside down so I began my favourite hobby of job searching. Does anybody else have a similar hobby? I also enjoy logging on to Rightmove and giving myself a pretend budget of £500k to buy a posh house. Sometimes I’ll even go to London to ‘rent’ extortionately expensive apartments no bigger than my maternity pants. This isn’t even Lockdown induced behaviour by the way.

My newest employment within an Electric and Plumbers company local to me has the hours any mum could only dream of. Every week the SAME three shifts. Tues, Weds, Thurs.. from 9am-3pm. A dream literally made to fit around the school run in which yes, my daughter will become a part of again as I unashamedly got on the phone to them as soon as I got offered the job. I’ve had numerous jobs but this felt a step in the right direction. I can now work and run my university course alongside on a Monday and Friday giving me the whole weekend to nag, cry and moan to my other half to my heart’s content.

The problem I’m currently having is that I’ve got to actually get off my arse? No, really its currently a genuine problem. I’ve fallen victim to lazy parenting, lazy tidying, cooking and cleaning and now I can rarely be arsed to even fart. I used to punish myself for sitting and relaxing, it never felt right and now I can’t get enough! I’ve watched all these programmes basically non stop for the last three weeks. All of which I HIGHLY recommend.

  • The Office (UK)
  • RuPaul’s drag race ALL 160 episodes of.
  • ITV’s “The Bay”
  • the Crown. (Man, that’s long)

I’ve also fully immersed myself into podcasts whilst cleaning (well, attempting to) but one I must mention is ‘Morbid’ which basically is quite self explanatory and I would recommend if you enjoy light hearted true crime and Ghost stories. The girls who do this podcast have me actually LOLLING out loud.

I do wonder when all this madness will end but I wonder more if we will suddenly miss the isolation lifestyle?


Today, I was putting some washing away and realized that I no longer have a t-shirt drawer? I have two pyjama and “loungewear” drawers? I honestly can’t remember the day that this happened but it felt like a pinnacle moment of my life. Another pinnacle was that I IRONED, yes IRONED three sets of flannel pyjamas yesterday? Please judge because I sure am.

Social Anxiety or living your best life?

Somebody said to me the other day “Jaz, it must be quite difficult for you at the moment going through all of this with a bit of a mental brain” (Her words, not mine) well, thanks for the concern there hun but you would be mistaken. The biggest excuse I ever used to get out of something was usually by ignoring the whole situation, turning my phone on silent and pretending I didn’t get the message. All of a sudden I don’t need to do that because nobody is doing anything! Covid-19 seems to have taken away all the stresses of stressing over social outings. Now, Covid-19 can be the reason for not letting somebody come into your house when it is not as clean as you would like and the reason you can just say NO to any type of social gathering. It can also be a fantastic excuse to sit consuming chocolatey treats and ..well, yourself. As great as it is, the amount of occasions that friends and family have mentioned all meeting up once all of ‘this’ is over is alarming. I’m actually preparing myself for accidentally on purpose lobbing my phone in the canal so I don’t have to commit to such outings and socialisation.

Don’t get me wrong when I’m in the mood for it I am the life and soul! I’m like Pringles, once you pop you just can’t stop! Get me in a room of 10 or more and I’m a bloody jack-in-a-box. I irritate my partner because I can’t and won’t sit still. Does anybody need any help? do I need the toilet? What’s in that room over there? It is bloody exhausting.

I once went on a day trip to London with my friend and her newborn son. She was slightly apprehensive understandably about tackling the tube with a pushchair and how the day would go in general. I took complete control, we were on and off that central line like shit off a stick, we walked miles, we talked for miles! it really was a fantastic, busy, chaotic but brilliant day out… I then didn’t leave the house for two whole days. I was overwhelmed and emotional from all the stimulation of the day before like that of an overstimulated newborn really. I could barely even parent that day. This is quite a common scenario, and also why I turn down so many social invitations even if I want to go as I have to consider what I’m doing for the few days after in case the day of fun puts me out of service… like a woozy, mental hangover without any alcohol.

I do have a small group of friends who I seem to socialise more with as they understand my situation and laugh at me when I just HAVE to get home for 10 pm. They accept I don’t like to drink too much and just let me be me, however odd I am! I must say though, it took me a long time to get to this point with people as I’m naturally a “people pleaser” which has definitely got me into some sticky situations in the past.

So to summerise, Covid-19 has done me a massive favour. What about you?